Sunrise: Lessons from 2011

To keep things simple, here is a list of what I learned and did in 2011:

1. I'm a bit more outward and open now.

• I started this blog. In the past I kept my thoughts and writings to myself. As of today I have consistent readers!
• I actually speak at work now. Yes, before I couldn't even ask a question - I couldn't bare disturb others with my troubles, I was too shy to start a conversation.
• I went to social events and dressed up for them.
• I took a chance at people. I made friends and close friends. Far more than I could have conceptualized I can. In the past I built invisible walls around me to keep me from getting hurt. The walls are still there, they just issue special passes now. It's not much but it's a change for someone so antisocial and scared of rejection.
• I'm not so uptight anymore. I throw a joke every now and then.

2.  I am no longer overweight

• I started 2011 tipping the scales at (way) more than 165 lbs. and ended the year with only over 130 lbs. A feat some people said I can never do.

3. Career wise, I gained experience, friendships and wisdom

• I was and still am onsite for a new project. It presented new frameworks, co-workers and challenges for me. I had to leave behind friends and team mates. Though I would never show it, moving on will always hurt. I credit to all my team mates (past and present) far more than knowledge gained but wisdom as well. I will always consider them as my mentors.

4. I got into sports

• I've played recreational badminton addictively in the past but had to stop because of the lack of time to do so. Last year I got to play again and even got tips on how to play better.
• I finally got to punch a real punching bag. As a child I used to punch rice sacks. Growing up, I punched walls, doors and chairs during bursts of anger. I got to box, did footwork in an actual ring and got trained by real boxers.
• I'm running. I run as much as I can. Though I've used to run or walk just to burn off steam, nowadays I run to train. 

5. I am grateful

• Though I've always been grateful, this year I value almost everything everyone does for me.

6. I got (partly) in touch with my feminine side.

• As I said I dressed up for events. I willingly wore dresses and makeup. I actually bought a dress for myself. My eyebrows were also threaded.

7. I broke my sobriety and learned it's harder to go sober a second time around

• For more than 2 years I was alcohol free. December 15 - Jan 3 I drank, not constantly though. But I'm saying no to alcohol again for my own sake.

8. I learned to fight for myself

• I would fight for my friends no doubt about it. But fighting for myself was always harder for me. I wouldn't be a push over anymore, thanks to some mentoring. I learned to say 'No' to favors and protect myself.

9.  I lost my temper, got in a fit of rage which scared the lights out of my co workers, persecuted myself for it and moved on.

• No one is tougher on me than me. I set my own principles, goals and standards. After a year of successfully managing my anger I burst. I couldn't forgive myself at first but I have to move on. What's done is done. There's no use crying over spilled milk. It's beautiful how we can always start over.

10. I got to enjoy my youth and my earnings

• I'm practical. Rather than spend it on myself, most of my salary goes to the bank. During the last few months of 2011 I got to splurge on me. Don't worry, I didn't break the bank. I got to be a child - carefree, protected and without much responsibility. I went places, tried new things, bought new things and loved doing it.

 I may have forgotten a few bits but here are the significant ones. Happy New Year to us all and may we continue to change for the better.