My birthday's coming up. I'm not going to tell you when nor will I tell you where or how I will celebrate. I will tell you though how I feel having lived another year.
The readers and followers of this blog probably know by now some of my history. My life may not be an open book but I leave pieces of the puzzle out in the open for people to figure me out. Now that I'm turning 22, I can hardly believe it. As a child I never saw myself as an adult. All I knew was I would get a job. I didn't really look that far into the future; probably because I never expected to reach this age.
I'm actually enjoying my life now. I do what I can do, more often far more than what I'm supposed to. But it's the thrills and pressures in life that makes it worth living, I know that now. I know that even though at times we feel so alone and unwanted, there still are some who care and need you. You are not the only one who feels "down", there are millions more, look beyond your own scenario, I used to be one of them.
What's bothering me now is the rising numbers of suicides in the country and how younger and younger they get. I can recall seeing news of professionals and young adults killing themselves twelve years ago. Now we hear of 4th graders hanging themselves, 13 year olds killing lovers and shooting themselves, elementary valedictorians "off-ing" themselves. I can't help but think I could have done something, but I don't know them, I never got the chance to.
Someone approached me in the past, she knew my story and said she had a friend going through what I went through. She asked me what she can do to help. I'm going to tell you what I told her. For there are people you know who need you, even if they say you can't help.
JUST BE THERE! That's all you can do. Show them you care, show them their important to you. Make them feel that you would be there rain or shine, WILLINGLY. The thing is you can't really make an actual move unless the person asks for your help, until he holds out his hand to be pulled out of the darkness. Before that happens all you can do is wait and be on the watch. Honestly, if you are sincere and show good intentions toward the person, you will get through.I was in "the dark ages" for 14 years and people still got through to me. JUST DON'T GIVE UP. Depressed people have tough layers. It took years to peel mine and I still have a few layers on.
There wouldn't be any young suicides if parents were there. If families are there to support. Leaving your children to fight the world without a guide is setting them up. SOMEONE HAS TO BE THERE FOR THEM - to talk to or to be with. People will constantly look for joy and affection and if it's not at home trust me they will move out to the world where there are predators and influences that will most definitely corrupt them.
Please do what you can do. Right now all I can do is write and make my voice heard. I'm not a materialistic person and all I want is to get through. If I would be given one present on my birthday I would ask the world to spare the children.
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